The Gold Standard for Married Men

wedding gaze

For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church.
Ephesians 5:25 NLT

Let’s face it men – Jesus has set the bar incredibly high.

Overwhelmingly high.

Infinitely high.

I think He does so to cause us to come face-to-face with our male pride, selfishness and  ridiculous overconfidence. The command to love my wife like He loves His Bride, the Church, forces me back to an unpleasant reality.

I cannot do this on my own.

I need Jesus to be the center both my life and my marriage. Without His supernatural grace, I am doomed for failure before I start.

What does it mean to love my wife like Jesus loves His bride?

#1. His love is selfless.

Jesus gives His life away so that we can experience life to the fullest (John 10:10). In the same way, my selfless love for my wife will focus on seeing her become all Jesus desires her to be.

#2. His love is sacrificial.

Jesus laid down His life for us. When a husband puts the needs of his wife before his own, he creates a safe place in the marriage where true intimacy can flourish. She sees his love and places her confidence and trust in her man. She feels valued and adored.

#3. His love is safe.

Christ’s love is pure. He always does what is best for His Bride. As a result, she flourishes in the safety of His selfless love. Does your wife feel safe within the secure boundaries of your covenant love? Is she able to open up to you? Does she trust you enough to let you in to the secret places of her heart? She’ll never open the door to greater intimacy if she cannot confidently place her heart in your hands.

#4. His love is secure.

Jesus said, ““I will never leave you nor forsake you.” (Hebrews 13:5 NKJV). Jesus is eternally committed to His bride. He expects the same covenant devotion from us as we love our wife. She must know that there is no back door, no plan B, no escape clause in fine print. You are committed to loving her forever. What does this produce in your marriage? Trust, confidence, and security.

Jesus sets the bar high. Infinitely high. We need Him to love our wives in the way He commands.

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